It’s no easy task to build self-esteem but achieving a healthy level of self-esteem can make a difference to your well-being. Take a look at these eight tactics to help bolster your self-esteem:
1. Write out a list of things you admire about yourself
It can be challenging to sit down and think about our admirable traits — even awkward. But acknowledging your skills or things you like about yourself can improve your self-talk. Try keeping a journal of things you’ve done that you enjoyed or admired. Gratitude journals also work wonders for improving your outlook on life and recognizing what you have to be thankful for.
2. Stop being a people pleaser
People with poor self-esteem can feel obligated to say yes to requests. They often put helping others before their own mental health. This can lead to being easily overwhelmed, whether that’s at work or in your personal life. That, in turn, causes a lot of stress. It’s nice to be helpful and supportive when you can, but your self-esteem eventually suffers when you tie your self-worth to how much you do for others. Learn how to say no to others.
3. Step outside your comfort zone
Those with low self-esteem tend to avoid challenges and new opportunities. This can be due to fears or self-doubt. But when you succeed in any big or small way, you show yourself that you can persevere through rough moments. Stepping outside your comfort zone doesn’t mean that you have to throw yourself into highly uncomfortable situations. It means you’re willing to try new things even if you enter difficult situations.
4. Stop comparing yourself to others
Your progress and self-worth shouldn’t be connected to how well other people are doing. There will always be someone better at something than you, but that doesn’t mean you’re not good at what you do, or good enough. It’s not easy to stop comparing yourself to others. But staying away from social media can help this effort. If you do scroll, remind yourself that people only share the best, most flattering parts of their life online. Don’t let likes on a photo dictate your self-worth. Practice an occasional digital detox to reduce your exposure. Appreciate your differences compared to others but remember that you’re not in competition with anyone else’s progress.
5. Forgive yourself for your past thoughts
As you work to build your self-esteem, you need to forgive yourself for how you treated yourself before. You can’t move forward with your progress without accepting that you used to judge yourself and others harshly. It’s a hard habit to break. Acknowledging this weakness exercises self-compassion and resilience by helping you see yourself clearly. You’re building a more solid foundation when you choose to have a healthier relationship with yourself.
6. Set boundaries in your relationships
Think about what your boundaries are in your personal and professional life. To have higher self-esteem, you need to understand what your boundaries look like and how they align with your values. Plus, you’ll need to think about how you’ll respond when people cross them because that’ll happen — intentionally or not. Setting boundaries is a way of not letting others control or take advantage of you and practicing assertiveness. Learning how to set boundaries at work may look different than in your personal life. You can mute notifications when the workday ends to maintain your work-life balance, but you can’t avoid your friends when you don’t know how to be firm with them. Be patient and be honest.
7. Celebrate your wins
Victories come in all sizes, and you should celebrate them all. Did you practice some positive self-talk today? Did you banish some negative beliefs or face one of your fears? Acknowledge those feelings of confidence and pride and embrace them. It’ll help your self-confidence grow and show you that building self-esteem helps you feel more comfortable with yourself.
8. Let go of negative people
It’s one thing to let go of negative thoughts, but have you thought about letting negative people go? The people you surround yourself with have a big impact on your mood and level of self-esteem. If people constantly remind you of your flaws, make fun of your mistakes, or fill you with self-doubt, you’ll have poor self-esteem. But letting those influences go will allow more positive encouragement and kinder thoughts to help grow your self-esteem. And once you identify someone’s toxic traits, it’s hard to see past them.
Boosting Confidence at Work
There are probably people you know at work who radiate self-confidence and seem to sail through every challenge with an innate sense of purpose and direction. But the truth is, very few of us feel naturally self-assured all the time. Tough transitions, such as getting a new boss, leaving a job, or even just some challenging feedback can knock our confidence. However, if we learn to value ourselves and establish supportive habits, we can strengthen our self-esteem. Here are five simple steps to help you build your confidence:
Treat yourself as you would a friend
We treat our friends well, offering words of encouragement when they’re feeling down. But often, we’re not as positive and kind when it comes to ourselves. Become your own best supporter and cheerleader. One great way of doing that is to write down and repeat positive affirmations, like: “I am accomplished and fulfilled” or “I am doing a great job.” Affirmations can have a positive, cumulative impact and if you keep repeating them, you’ll start to believe them.
Look back at work you’re proud of
A simple way of boosting your confidence is to keep a folder (on your computer or a hard copy that you print out), with projects you’re proud of completing, as well as praise or kudos you’ve received in the past from managers and peers. Glancing at a note from your boss thanking you for a job well done, or an email from a co-worker full of gratitude for support you provided acts as a confidence trigger, reminding you that you are valuable.
Listen to people when they tell you about your strengths
If you need a confidence boost, connect with work colleagues you respect and ask them for positive feedback. Sometimes it’s helpful to hear from another person how exactly you contribute to your team. When your colleague tells you how diligent, talented and considerate you are, take it in.
Step out of your comfort zone
Taking risks is great for our well-being and confidence. That doesn’t mean jumping out of a plane, it can simply be doing something outside your regular routine. At work, that might mean striking up a conversation with someone you’d like to get to know or suggesting a new idea in a meeting.
Celebrate all wins, no matter their size
Write down what you’re proud of completing at the end of each day or week. This might be as simple as connecting with a new co-worker, meeting a deadline, or making progress in your garden after work. And celebrate other people’s wins, too. Sometimes we can allow co-workers’ successes to deflate us and sink our own confidence. But instead, you can choose to be inspired and encouraged by their wins, knowing that there’s room for everyone to succeed.
Very educative and helpful