Anyone
can learn to be confident. True confidence comes from training and competence.
It is not something that some are born with or without. If you have been living
a life struggling with how to build confidence this information is what you
need to hear. These eight things will help you build confidence that lasts:
1. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Each person is different. We were all born with
things that we are naturally better at than others, and some things that we
will never be great at no matter how hard we try. That’s ok. If you want to
build the real confidence you need to stop trying to be like everyone else and
learn to be the best you that you can be. The only comparison a truly confident
person makes is to the person he/she was yesterday – and to the person, he/she
hopes to become someday. If you’re wondering how to build confidence, stop
comparing yourself with others and start working on improving yourself.
2. Track Your Successes
When you see the areas that you are competent in
and succeeding, you naturally begin to feel more confident. Write down at least
three successes that they have at the end of each day. Not feeling very
successful? If you struggle with low confidence, it might be hard for you to
identify three successes every day, but you need to do it anyway. These can be
simple successes like writing, I paid my mortgage today. That might not be
something you previously viewed as a success, but there are a lot of people
that are unable to pay their mortgage, or they just don’t care if they do it or
not. Start to look at your daily life and acknowledge the areas, big or small, that
you are already succeeding.
3. Visualize Yourself Succeeding and Being
Confident
Visualizations are a powerful tool that you can
use to help build confidence. Spend time each day visualizing yourself stepping
out, taking risks, and succeeding at them. This is essentially practicing being
confident. Rehearse in your head the way that you will confidently respond to
opportunities that you are presented with. The more you ”practice”, the more
likely you will be to act confidently when new situations arise.
4. Change your Opinion of Failure
Many people who fear failure also struggle with
handling failure. It’s hard to remain confident if you fall apart every time
you fail at something. If you think that you are a ”failure” because you didn’t
achieve exactly what you wanted at something, it will be impossible for you
ever truly to feel confident. You have to change the way you think about
failure. Failure is something that you
can learn from. If you look at the history of successful people in both the
past and the present, their lives are scattered with failure. Even the most
successful people fail–often at many different things.
5. Quit the Negative Self–Talk
Many people say more negative things about
themselves than anyone else will ever say about them. For example, calling
yourself ”a failure” is different than recognizing that you didn’t meet your
goal. You will not succeed at building self–confidence if you are constantly
knocking yourself down. Start speaking affirmations to yourself. It will feel
awkward at first but stick with it. Take your list of successes each day and
speak them out loud to yourself. Make a list of things that you are good at,
stand in front of a mirror, and say them out loud while you look at yourself.
Start building yourself up instead of tearing yourself down.
6. Practice Self–Care
One of the first steps you can take in building
your confidence is to take care of yourself. When you are tired, not providing
yourself with proper nourishment, and not getting enough exercise it can be
difficult to feel confident and good about yourself. Start by making sure that
you get enough sleep every night. Instead of trying to push your work into the
early morning hours, go to bed and rest. Make sure you get at least seven hours
of sleep a night. You will be more rested which helps you have a better outlook
on life.
If you aren’t exercising, it’s time to get
started. Physical activity helps you boost your confidence by boosting your
mood and helping you feel better physically. The stronger you get, the more you
feel you can accomplish. Don’t forget to get outside and get some fresh air and
sunshine. A simple walk outside can boost your mood instantly. Make sure you
are making wise eating decisions. Drink plenty of water and choose foods that
will give you the energy you need naturally so you avoid that mid–afternoon
crash that too much sugar, coffee, and energy drinks can leave you with.
7. Don’t Be Afraid to Get Help
If you are dealing with crushed confidence and
low self–esteem from events and situations in your past they can be difficult
to move past on your own. If you feel stuck and aren’t making the progress that
you would like in this area, then don’t be afraid to reach out for help. EAP
Assist counsellors will help you work through your past, determine your
hang–ups, and help you take the steps that you need to move forward with
confidence.
Life should be lived to the fullest. If a lack
of confidence is holding you back, it’s time to start making a change today.
Every little step forward is a step in the right direction.