If we wish to love each other, we need to know what the other person wants. What makes one person feel loved is not always the thing that makes another person feel loved. It is useful to know our partners primary language of love, if we are to be effective communicators of love.
Words of Affirmation: Compliments, words of appreciation and encouragement, requests rather than demands all affirm the self-worth of your partner. They can create intimacy, heal wounds and help our partners reach their potential.
Quality Time: Spending time together, giving your partner your undivided attention, sharing, listening, participating in joint meaningful activities communicates that we care for and truly enjoy each other. Togetherness.
Receiving Gifts: Gifts are visual symbols of love, whether they are purchased or made, or your presence made available to your partner. Gifts demonstrate that you care and they represent the value of friendship.
Acts of Service: Expressing love by doing things or serving your partner. Acts of service are not coerced, but are freely given and received and completed as requested.
Physical Touch: Physical touch, as a gesture of love, reaches to the depths of our being. As a language of love, it is a powerful form of communication from the smallest touch on the shoulder to the most passionate sexual encounter.
Discover your primary love language…
What have you most often requested of your partner? The thing that you have most often requested is likely the thing that would make you feel the most loved. In what ways do you regularly express love to your partner? Your method of expressing love may be an indication that this would also make you feel loved. One you know what you want, verbalise these things to your partner – don’t ask them to mind read.